BUILT TO LEAD

Today, at the end of practice with my favorite Chitown client, FD hit the team with some good truth about why we call BTL practice, well, practice. He reminded them that when he played professional soccer, the team practiced for six days a week and played games for one. He told them the reason we’re listening to Macklemore songs instead of Tony Robbins bullshit is because we’re not trying to inspire them for one more push up the mountain, or one more run through the burning coals. We call BTL practice, practice, because it’s means what it says – we’re practicing.

We’re not in a meeting when we hold BTL practice, are we? Nope, we’re not. Meetings are mundane, boring, and mostly about some kinda update or cya. Practice is about improving skill, building trust, and exposing strengths and weaknesses alike. This is not normal. You gotta love the practice and the pursuit of getting better. You gotta be willing to be vulnerable and exposed. Nobody is untouchable in BTL practice, not even the President. You see, in BTL practice we’re all peers, we’re all just people aimed at becoming virtuous teammates, the kind we can all count upon.

Don’t let this be an inspirational day, FD challenged our Chitown team. Go practice. Go choose to do the work. Go choose to practice prior to our next team practice. I mean come on man, do you think professionals only practice when the coach blows the whistle? Of course not. Professionals focus on the process not the result. Professionals understand that practice, practice, practice, is the process. Next month this team of professionals is gonna have one helluva practice. Today, laid the foundation. They’ve got a bunch of PA to knock out and I’m certain at least a few are gonna take a swing at it. I can hardly wait.

Today, we learned that good intentions aren’t enough, burying the pain doesn’t work for long, loving what the labor affords isn’t the same as living a labor of love, and that the good old days are now. Yes, friend, these are the good old days. Make them count. Thanks, Macklemore, for being such a great storyteller and artist, kinda like Coldplay and their song Talk, it’s a whole lot easier to learn leadership from artists than it is to learn it from talking heads. God, help me keep mastering this art. God, help me keep doing the work, modeling the way, embracing pain and suffering, and embodying truth in love. God, help me never forget that good intentions aren’t enough. God, help me. Good…

One of my favorite playlists is titled “Macklemore Messes.” This morning I’m listening to a handful of new songs I added to this baby. At the moment the song titled Church Is making me think. You see, my take on “Mac” is that he mostly writes songs about the mess going on in his head. My gosh can I relate. My natural wiring is to catastrophize things and, well, make a mess of things, at least in my mind. I fight this tendency nearly every day and, kinda paradoxically, I also fight the tendency to think I can do almost anything. Yeah, I don’t lack confidence in spite of my catastrophic thinking. Sometimes my over-confidence (arrogance/hubris/cockiness) gets me thinking I can do stuff, push limits, and accomplish things that are “realistically” out of reach. Sometimes this results in freakin’ magic in the makin. Sometimes this gets me out over my ski’s and results in catastrophe.

I am in work in process no different than you my friend. Most of my messes are a result of my mistakes. Sometimes I can’t get out of my own head with negativity and sometimes I bite off more than I can chew. Sometimes I listen well to the wise sage inside and sometimes I listen to my inner idiot. Life lessons and loss teach us all more than winning season after winning season. You may be fortunate, friend, to mostly chalk up victory after victory and have it going on, you know? You may be filled with a strong sense of self. You may be less fortunate and find yourself filled with fear, insecurity, and doubt. You may lack a sense of who you are or fear, worse yet, that who you are is one, big, failure.

See yourself friend, as I believe your Creator does. You see, aint none of us whole. All of us are broken vessels, leaking, and looking for someone or something to stop the bleeding. We are, I believe, looking in all the wrong places when we limit our gaze to what we can see. Look up. Ask God if he sees you for who you really are, ’cause, you know He does. Ask God to guide your mind. Good.

You and I are messes. God sees us as a beautiful mess. God, help me listen to your word; my little voices, not so much. God, help me listen for you. God, help me…

Practice two felt like practice twenty last week with a team of ballers. We had one of the athletes read the lyrics to the song titled Talk and then we, well, talked – really talked. One teammate challenged herself and her teammates to “learn to listen to the words not the person saying them. We tend to tune out some teammates because of who they are, at least who we think they are in our mind,” she kinda sheepishly continued. You could tell by tuning into her that she meant what she said. Are we really only on practice two, I heard my little voice say to me. Before I had time to process what was happening, one of the captains shared some real freakin’ magic regarding her interpretation of the song. “We are all chapters in ONE book. We gotta understand each other’s language before we can make sense of the book.” “We too focused on our own chapter,” she exclaimed with shoot in her eyes, “And, it ain’t all about me.”

Practice two and this team, when given the option of finishing on time or going into overtime to finish off the big five fears, chose to go late and finish what we started. They could have opted to end on time and get back to being college athletes and just hang for awhile. I mean come on man, it was late and these are busy, tired, teammates only on practice two. They chose, instead, to finish what we started. And, finish strong they did. A couple of ’em got so engaged in understanding fears that the “Amens” were coming so fast and frequently that more than a few laughed and said the locker room felt more like they were in Church – ’cause, well, in so many ways they were.

You see, BTL team practice is designed to cause community. We can’t create it, only you all can do that. We simply know a thing or two about being the catalyst to help you and your team elevate your dialogue, deepen trust, and form a community where your chapters come together and seamlessly connect diverse thoughts into something that not only makes sense, but makes you more ONE than you’ve ever been before. We are all chapters. Never thought of it that way. We’re all chapters. Chapters.

You know, friend, we are all chapters in ONE book…

Today, during a one on one practice, a client began to tell me about some of his “small bets.” He had taken me up on the challenge of making more bets when it came to marketing himself and his services. You see, a few years back, I asked my son Jordan to help me understand the biggest difference between professional poker players and really good amateur ones. He responded by telling me it was “small bets.” When I asked him to tell me more, he explained that pro’s play a ton more games than the amateurs. He’s not talking about tournaments or high stakes tables, he exclaimed. Everybody shows up for the big events. The pros simply make a bunch more small bets in their everyday games.

So, friend, when it comes to marketing your magic, you probably need to make more bets. It’s not about going all in, it’s about playing more games, making more small bets, and slowly figuring out what leads to more winning hands.

Go on, take a few more fliers. Don’t bet the farm, but bet something. Masters make more bets than most. And, it turns out, most of their bets are small. Thanks, Jordan, for the pointer. Poker players, producers, social media magnates, and superb salespeople in general, make more small bets. What about you, friend?

Good…

Practice, this past week, revealed a misplaced focus by one of my clients. He, like you and me, lost it recently with one he loves. When he wrote the root of his untimely anger, it was in some misplaced combination of “woe is me,” and worrying about me – about how she is making me look to those around me. Both of these are focused on externals. Focusing on externals should be at the top of all humans “stop doing list.” You see, friend, focusing on externals is like giving your mind to strangers, family members, coworkers, and clients. You wouldn’t give your body over to these people, would you?

Why, then, do you so readily give them your mind?

You control your character. Focus here, instead. Maybe you should re-read yesterdays rant regarding inner, other, outer. Your circumstance is not your problem. Your response is. Focus on responding to the input of life in alignment with your CORE – with who you’ve chosen to become. Hopefully, this is a timely character reminder my friend.

Good…

Normal humans (you don’t want normal, friend) are focused on their outer life, others lives, and next to never on their inner life. High performers flip the focus. Putting first things first, remember, doesn’t make second things less. Instead (Thanks C.S. Lewis), putting first things first makes second things more.

Inner. Other. Outer.

Focus your attention inward, first. Think of this as if you are listening to the flight attendant when she tells you to put your oxygen mask on first. Next you need to look up from iPhone and focus your attention on the significant others with you. Most distractions that derail performances are emotional ones. Today, most of those are rooted in disconnects with loved ones and teammates we’re not turned toward. Lastly, focus your attention on your system. See all the connections from you to your team, your market and beyond.

A lack of inner focus leads to a rudderless leader. A lack of other focus leads to a clueless leader. And, a lack of outer focus leads to a leader experiencing a sudden system surprise sometime soon. Yikes. This leader has just been blindsided. Not good. You need to build your second nature, my friend. You need to start within, continue with others, and finally become a student of your system. You are a house divided and it starts with a mind divided. Focus yours. Start now. Wanna know how? Write. Write. And, write some more. Clarity will come. Most likely it will come suddenly in the form of surprise. These kind of surprises we call insights. We like these kinda surprises.

Inner. Other. Outer. We could use a few more leaders who steer through chaos with an amazing sense of calm, connect deeply in work/life, and see the future with insights we turn into innovations. Who knew clarity within was the lynchpin to insights we can use. Who knew? Well, now you do. Good…

Another amazing week winding down (at the moment in downtown KC) with Krits, Miss, and little Miss Penny. A couple times this week I’ve heard people describe how they’ve made it into the life/work of their dreams by “betting on me.” This is true and incomplete. Yes, if you are to become an entrepreneur of life, friend, you’re gonna have to place a big bet on yourself. You cannot live well while being as Ayn Rand described, “second handers.” In other words you’ve got to sing your song, not parrot (second hander) someone else. Fact. So, you’ve got to bet on you which means you better build into you before going all in, right? This only makes sense.

And, you cannot stop betting here. You’ve got to bet on we too. If my life was as simple as betting on me, there would be no need for my Miss beside me. I would simply build my CORE, author my OPUS, and get busy betting on my PA (productive action) to bring it into being. The problem with betting on me is when I realize going all in at the me table is gonna leave me lacking. I suck at so many things and don’t want to labor improving in areas that drain me. Without good, complimentary partners (Miss and many, many more) I would have no choice but to learn to labor into pain. Not good.

Bet on we.

Miss and her strengths compliments my deficits. Where I see nothing but blue sky she reminds me of the clouds a coming. Together we see so much more than either of us on our own. I’m betting on we. The BTL band is better than Chet singing solo. Gurue, Kitty, Browny, Petey, and FD bring skills, perspectives, and contributions that I cannot. I’m betting on we. The BTL clients are the berries. Without Brett, Durp, Grappy, Dub, Slo, Kevin, Cbear, Joeylamb, Brian, Rich, Tommyc, Kyle, Dave, Ron, Steve, Dantheman, and Worldwiderobert, I wouldn’t have, well, a business. Without the right kinda clients, this experiment would lack the catalyst for becoming freakin’ magic. I mean you cannot be your best without family, friends, and clients that take your freakin’ magic and transform it into more, not less, as you mix it up. So, friend, be careful to bet on me and kinda forget how important it is who you bet on beside you. Every one of us is most affected by the ones we choose to circle around us. Choose wisely when betting on we.

Bet on me. Good. Betting on the right we? Freakin’ magic in the making for today, tomorrow, and even for that day when we’re dust. You see, betting on we leads to a legacy way beyond you and me.

Bet on we. Good…