by Johnny Rue, BUILT TO LEAD
I had a fun practice with “LoveCo” today. You might remember them as the young team of 20 & 30 somethings building HUGE chemistry . . .
When I asked this question, I couldn’t believe how quickly a couple of the young lions roared out “YES! Of COURSE I would follow me. In FACT, I wish I had a TWIN so I could get twice as much DONE!”
They dared me to challenge them. With a twinkle, I told the rest of their team this is EXACTLY the problem we see with many of our client CEOs when we begin meeting with them, and asked the team if they saw it too. A more reserved 20-something piped up right away, “Sure, they probably have a team that’s very frustrated because they aren’t trusted enough to do their own work or make decisions without running everything by THEM.”
Today we re-visited the importance of building trust, which starts with building personal trust. You can read more about it in the 8 Essentials, starting on p. 42, which states that “Personal trust is the ability for trusting oneself. This is where it all starts. Tragically, for many leaders this is where it all stops. Confidence, clarity and conviction are rarely given to a team from a leader who is lacking personal trust. . . .Trusting yourself will be your toughest test. You will need to look in the mirror and SLOW DOWN enough to really see the person staring back at you. You will also need the help of true friends. You will need some “truth tellers.” None of us is an island. Remember, TOGETHER WE IMPROVE. This will take time and courage. You decide. Your choices have consequences.”
The nature of every relationship is that it has areas both parties see in common as well as areas neither sees. There are also areas that are BLIND SPOTS for the one that the other sees clearly, and vice versa.
These blind spots are some of the best tests of the trust level in the relationship. Some tests are easier than others — for example, if a fellow team member had a peanut shell stuck between his front teeth, it might be fun for awhile to watch the reaction of others around the coffee room — but few would hesitate to save the teammate from the awkward embarrassment if it was prior to an important meeting. On the other hand, MANY teammates and leaders walk around with far more GLARING character flaws, but FEW pass the test of being willing to address THESE blind spots.
Why?
Because most teams FEAR more than they TRUST. Few teams and even fewer leaders have really made it “safe” for their teammates to be truth-tellers.
Have you given others the “green” light to give you feedback that might make you BETTER? Few do. Most of us are only approachable under “flashing yellow” with extreme caution. Sadder yet, some of us have erected subtle but unmistakable stop signs to keep truth-tellers at bay.
It takes a strong CORE to post a “green light”, not just passively but PRO-ACTIVELY. It takes an even STRONGER core to fight for your team to do likewise. Without it, the only personal trust that’s built is BLIND, and the whole team is guilty of following the BLIND because they have the ability to SEE but aren’t willing to speak up.
That’s a formula for mediocrity — not high performance.
At BUILT TO LEAD, we believe great leaders lead themselves FIRST. They are always learning and growing in their self-awareness, plus actively seeking and working to close their integrity gaps.
Which takes HUMILITY.
Here’s the PRODUCTIVE ACTIONS that LoveCo and the young lions agreed to do between now and next time. Take the challenge and do the same with your team:
“Look in the mirror and identify an integrity gap where you could grow in your own personal trust, and jot down some ideas for how to close it. Seek out a fellow builder who is a truth-teller and courage-giver for their clarity & help. And then be willing to do the same as a fellow builder for another.”
In the DOING so, I have HIGH trust that we can expect some very cool results.
BUILT TO LEAD 