Conflicted…

We all experience conflict. For instance, we all get hungry every few hours. We resolve this “conflict” by finding something to eat. Some of us resolve this very basic conflict more productively than others. The same is true for resolving conflict in work and life. I’ve written about this topic on countless occasions. Every day I choose to resolve conflict. Some days I solve it with “fast food,” while other days I slow down and resolve these problems more wisely. How ’bout you?

BUILT TO LEAD is in the business of solving problems. We help our family, friends, and clients improve their performance in work and life. We help them resolve conflict. We help them learn productive ways to fight through conflict. We help them laugh and not languish in conflict that is here to stay. We are pretty much conflict conquerors. Consider us your battle ready troops. We’ve been through this WAR before and have learned how to get things done.

It all sounds good. Here’s the reality. We pretty much suck at resolving conflict. We know what to do. We know how to do. We know when to do. We know who to do. We even know WHY we WANT to do. We know a lot of stuff. We do a lot of things. We ACT. Yet conflict continues.

We know who we are in our CORE and we know who are teammates are as well. We know each others personality types. We know their DISC, MBTI, Stengthsfinder, Explanatory style, Learning style, and just about every other style. And yet we still have conflict. We are much better at resolving your conflict than we are at resolving our own.

Maybe therin lies the nugget of wisdom. Maybe that’s the melody line for conquering conflict. Maybe the problem is not fixing conflict with another; even another that drives you freakin’ nuts. Maybe the answer…

Maybe, peace with others starts with PEACE within. Maybe…

What problems do you continue to solve too quickly and not too deeply? Who do you continue to have conflict with and why? Have you discovered anything about yourself, your family, your “little voice,” that may be the real problem? Why do you run from a fight? Why do you run into the room looking for a fight? Why do you find yourself saying…”just forget it, I can’t talk to you about anything!” Why do certain people always put you off?

Why are you better at resolving others conflicts than your own?

Why?