Today, I told one of my clients to get comfortable giving to the point of acute pain with those he loves. Great marriages are never equal partnerships. Someone has to choose to lose. Few titans of industry (who btw are my client base) have the ability to win on the battlefield, in the boardroom, and switch it off in the bedroom. The few that do, however, receive more than dividends over the long haul.
And, I reminded another to never even give the perception of taking from his team. Never take from your team, I exhorted him. Never. This is an incredibly high bar when the position and power are theirs for the taking. Most take advantage of this hard won position without so much as a thought. They see this as the privilege of leadership; the team, not so much. The more I immerse myself in the essence of leadership, the more convinced I am the only virtuous leader is the reluctant one. Are you beginning to see this?
You see, the responsibility of leadership is much greater than the reward. Individual contributors can achieve greatness much easier. Being a great Producer is like falling outa bed compared to being a great President or parent. Never put yourself in the position to be perceived as taking from your team. That, my friends, is the virtuous leaders bar.
You want that?
BUILT TO LEAD 
Awesome, Toto. For anyone willing to listen and trust what u say, they will discover something very precious. Sooner or probably not but later, your spouse and your team will want to GIVE to u what u were trying to take. Ps this is NOT a given and will backfire if u view this as an expectation vs a principle. If and when you experience being given to — do not TAKE it but DO be sure to RECEIVE it. With thanksgiving AND humility. As u practice this u will see MORE of the transformation — first in u, and then around u. Do not confuse the order.