Sometimes part of turning 50 or whatever decade is getting a nice scrapbook of pictures and stories from family and friends.
The melody line of mine was just that — how “nice” I am. A nice guy. Maybe even the nicest guy they’ve known.
Sadly, it’s true. As a boy I was groomed nice, followed by years dedicated to perfecting the ART of niceness. Professionally nice most of the time, unprofessionally nice when necessary.
Why “sadly”? Well because being “nice” does NOT = truth in love. In fact it’s anything BUT that, and sometimes even the OPPOSITE. Furthermore, it always leaves it someone else to be the ‘bad’ guy — like my wife, which doesn’t feel very nice to her.
As a longtime student of God, I have yet to find any Scripture that describes God as nice. Kind yes. Loving yes. Truthful yes. Strong yes. Even dangerous yes.
In God’s sense of humor, I’m getting some really nice people to build into. . .which means plenty of opportunities to plank niceness away into something way better. . .a strong CORE. Which yields —
True self without the facade.
Freedom to really serve, not just “please.”
A fighter for truth when THAT’s what’s most loving.
Courage to wade in even if it means risking rejection.
Toughness to make the hard call and communicate it with timeliness.
THIS is what our families need. Our teams need. WE need. God, help us NOT settle for “nice”. . .and hopefully much sooner than age 50. Give us the courage and humility to be built and to build others, so that as we speak the truth in love — together we improve.
Which will build a legacy that is TRULY nice.
BUILT TO LEAD 
Hello everyone, my name is David and I’m a recovering placater on my way towards s.CORE’ing with courage and humility as well.
Thanks for the nice post Sir Rue – you a most certainly not alone on this one!
I was going to say that’s the “nicest” thing you’ve wrote in a while and then I saw it was John that wrote this and not Chet! I thought it was strange that people would be calling Chet so nice. I love what you wrote about what a s.core yields…I’ll keep building mine because I really want the freedom to really serve, not just “please.”