Guess you can…

Yesterday, a client told me that he really doesn’t like it when his wife plays this little game with him.  I asked him to tell me more…

Lots of women and men like to play this game.  I like to call it “guess u can’t.”  Here’s how it is played around the globe.  The sender sends a few key words and some kinda body language, just enough for you to figure out what they want.

Or so they think.

Your job is to pick up on all the partial signals, piece together their deep, and partially hidden desires, and give them what they want you to give them.  This rarely ends well.  The sender usually leaves frustrated and feeling that the receiver just doesn’t “get them.”  The problem isn’t that.  The problem is that the receiver never “got it.”  Most receivers, remember, have really poor reception and need us senders to send our signals with more CCD.

Clear, concise, and Direct.

This is the recipe for gaining clarity in your communications.  It just is.

My client liked this reminder and was all jacked up to play this little game the right way.  Cool.

We jumped to the next topic about communicating with his Boss about his desire for a more challenging assignment.  I asked him how it was going.  Without thinking, he told me that he had “dropped some hints, but that he wasn’t responding.”  “I’m not sure he gets it,” he continued.  I about blew a gasket…

Houston, we have a problem. Houston, we seem to hate to play somebody else’s game of guess u can’t while still loving to play our version that we believe is more like guess u can. Funny, huh.

God, help us learn how to speak clear, concise, and direct. God help us learn how to tell other humans exactly what we want.   God, help our leaders understand that their team is too filled with FEAR to tell them the unvarnished truth.  AND, God help all spouses to understand that this same FEAR is what causes our loved ones to play guess u can’t.  It just is.

God, help us to learn your language.  God, help us to speak truth in LOVE.

God, help me to not play games when I attempt to connect.

God, help me…