Affirmation vs. information version 5.0…

Most people, when they ask for feedback, want affirmation not information. Most coaches, in the business world, understand this and give their clients exactly what they want, a cheerleader. Somebody that makes them feel better about themselves. Somebody that affirms the goodness in their strengths and gets them to take their eyes off bad habits, as if not looking will somehow make the problem disappear. And, the fact is that the world is full of coaches, leaders, and associates that are all playing this game.

The truth is that the higher up you get in whatever system you’re in the more desperately you need information not affirmation. And, the less likely you are to even sniff it. Today, I gave one of my clients information he can use. I used few words. I asked him to tell me what he heard and why he thought he was hearing it. I didn’t let him off the hook until he thought his way through it, until it had become his idea. He converted this feedback into his new PA and we parted ways, each of us knowing that the result of our interaction had built us both…


Today, a couple teammates were given the chance to give their leader some information. One chose to do so. One clearly took a pass. This leader has work to do to make it safe for all to speak truth, especially hard truth. Work to be done, here. Always work to be done to hear more truth from your teammates.

Give your leaders some information they can use. Tell them something they can’t see from their perch, but you see with clarity from your position. Don’t deliver it in anger and don’t deliver it with attitude. Truth in love is always the aim. And, leaders stop asking folks questions that lead to affirmation. Ask them tough questions, in safe environments, that prime them to tell you the truth. This kinda information exchange will make you both…


Every team could use another truth teller, truth hearer, and true performer in your position. Good…

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