Resilience, as defined by Mirriam Webster is, “the ability of something to return to its original shape after it has been pulled, stretched, pressed, bent, etc.” In other words, we humans, if we’re resilient, are going to bounce back when boyfriends betray, girlfriends go away, sons are taken, divorce divides, disease descends, gravity grabs, and all kinda adversity knocks us on our collective backside. Fact – there is no bouncing back. Resilient or not, we cannot go back.
There is no bouncing back for my right shoulder. None. No matter what I do, it’s never going back the way it once was. You see, my AC joint is gone and no surgeon can find it and put it back. My only option is to learn how to operate my right side without it. My only option is to work my way through it – yes, through. The same is true for all adversity. You and I do not bounce back. The resilient response is through – move through – to use what hits you to change your trajectory in a positive direction. Hemingway further hammers it home when he famously wrote this: “The world breaks every one and afterward many are strong at the broken places.”
So, friend, take solace in knowing you are not alone and your aim isn’t to bounce back. It feels good to let go of that aim, at least for me. Make your peace with your bumps and bruises and even some of those who seemingly still provide ’em. Your aim is to keep moving through. Through.
Thanks, Miss, for not stopping when you were so sick. Thanks, Mom, for carrying on 20 + years by your lonesome and moving through it to give courage to those just starting to get into it. Thanks, Petey, for moving through so many knee and hip surgeries and still getting after it at 67. Thanks, Dosch, for moving through anxiety on your way to excellence. Thanks, Gurue, for moving through your loss and finding your Lord. Move through, friend. There’s no returning to the way you were. There’s no going ’round the pain. There’s no going back. Through. God, help me keep going. God, help me through. Good.
Live hard. Love harder (Thanks, Teeks)…