Developing discipline matters. A lot. AND being “self-controlling” is a heckuva lot easier when you’re core-centered, first. Let me explain how I re-learned this truth just recently.
A couple weeks ago I had a conversation with an acquaintance that threw me all out of sorts. He let me know, unsolicited, that the way I went about things wasn’t to his liking. He thought I was too intense and asked too many questions. I listened. We parted ways. I became more and more irritated as the day went on. I mean, this guy didn’t know me, he didn’t bother to ask why I did what I did – who the hell does he think he is? So went my inner monologue. Not good.
I woke up the next day already laughing at myself. I talked it through with a fellow builder and mentioned that I really need to be more self-controlling. Why let someone get under my skin like that, right? He hit me with some truth in love. I don’t need to be more self-controlling, I need a clearer and stronger core. You see, I’m an intense and curious human. Fact. Be good with who I am, with how I am. And then when someone tells me I’m too much of who I am – it’s easy to laugh in the moment and let them know they’re totally right. I am too much for some. And I’m good with that. No irritation and no self control needed.
We only have so much will power, friends. That’s a fact. Spend less of it on areas you don’t need to and you’ll have more for the areas you do. Spend less of it wanting things to be different, and more of it being good with how they are. Get clarity on your why, your way, and be good with it. Do less of what doesn’t align with your core. Persisting and resisting suddenly don’t seem as formidable once you’ve got clarity and a strong core.
So find a weak spot in your core and get busy writing. Beef up an identity statement or two. Remind yourself of who you are and how you are and go be good with it.