EQ First

Today I spent some time in the playbook with one of my clients who has a bad case of passive empathy.  In other words, he cares but “not that really” as my 7 year old would say.  If you’re a leader of anything, this is not so good.  So we went through an exercise that challenged him to think about what he would ask a new doctor before he decided to open his kimono (so to speak).  Low and behold we found a simplistic, yet powerful, truth about the importance of EQ.  Let me explain…

A good doctor understands their most important job is to assume less and ask more FIRST to figure out if we have a cold or cancer. Any wrong assumptions in this line of work is a potential life or death mistake, not good.  AND after this is done, the magic really happens.  Do you know what it is?  Because trust was built FIRST by asking purposeful questions, the patient is now more likely to support the good doc’s IQ, in the form of a diagnosis and treatment plan.

This exercise reveals so many things we should be emulating if we truly desire to lead others.  A person who seeks to deeply understand another FIRST opens the door for a relationship built on trust and support.  Fact.  Trust and support are key ingredients to a high performance team.  Are you a leader looking for clarity in your system or just alignment with what you believe?  Are you removing all prejudice and preconceptions so that you don’t miss something?  Are you leading with your IQ or your EQ or passively with neither? Your team knows the difference.  Want a better team, lead with your EQ.

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