
During another hard practice with my apprentice, we talked about one of her clients who lacks an edge. He’s a super nice dude. Everybody loves him, she said. I stopped her mid-sentence. Everybody, I asked? Yes. Everybody. Here’s some ccd magic, leader. Remember this.
If everybody loves you, you’re not a leader – you’re a Cheerleader.
Here’s a freeing thought. You, leader, don’t have to be tougher. You must be truer. Read day 173 over and over and over. I completely changed this day after the book was published. Stopped the presses. Republished. It means that much to me. Too many modern leaders struggle being tough enough. They over value being liked, and consensus building. They over value being nice. Jesus was not nice. He is kind. Nice, remember, is love in appearance. Kind is love in action. Stop aiming at nice. Be kind.
People are drawn to truth and people run from truth. When you are truer, leader, you will polarize teammates. Fact. When you placate power, you polarize. When you demand excellence, you polarize. When you tolerate abusive teammates, you polarize. When you coddle ‘em, you polarize. When you take on bullies, you polarize. Lead anything well and you will polarize. You will experience resistance, oftentimes from the very people you are trying to help. Damn. Friedman was right, all systems sabotage from within. Truth.
If everybody loves you, you’re not a leader – you’re a Cheerleader.
Slow down. Reflect. Write. Where, leader, do you need to be truer? What are you waiting for, friend, for that special moment when the time is somehow oh so right? Bullshit. Face the truth. Build courage. Be kind. Embody truth in love. Be truer. Now that, leader, is tough and tender. Truth.
Live hard. Love harder…