Control…

Yesterday’s post likely riled up a few folks. Whenever I write about fighting, I get a few well intended notes from friends, clients, and complete strangers who want to correct my thinking. They tell me stories about family feuds, company bullies, angry birds, and playground power plays. These are not productive, Chet, what the hell are you promoting? My response is ccd – I agree. I’m not promoting bad behavior. Here’s the lynchpin, I remind them, to fighting to improve performance.

Control your anger.

You don’t lose your temper. This is a lie. You choose to get angry. If you’re going to fight to improve performance, you must not allow your emotional brain (amygdala) to override your rational brain (neocortex). When a teammate triggers you, you have a few seconds to either rein it in or allow it to run wild. You do not lose your temper. You control your mind. Do not give others the power to make you their plaything. Feel. Think. Act. This is the recipe. Do not skip the middle step…

Now, you are ready to fight to improve performance. Breathe deeply to control your central nervous system. Focus on facts. Listen for the yearning. Be open to ideas unlike your own. Use your brain to process alternatives and play with what (if anything) to do with it. When you don’t take yourself too seriously, when you’re aware of your ego, and when you know your emotional triggers, you are equipped and ready to fight for right. Be a humble warrior. Be a mustang. Be a woman who wants what’s best for the team. Slow down. Reflect. Write. Well done, my friend. Well done.

Live hard. Love harder…