Hard on self, not down on self. This is the mindset required for building excellence. Most of us are soft on self, hard on others. This is normal. This actually builds self esteem as it builds self delusion. Do not aim at normal, friend. If you want to build a second nature, a better version of you, you must flip your internal script when reacting to the input of life. When a crazy person won’t stop texting you late at night, stop telling yourself that they are a whack job and begin to own what you’ve done to cause them to think you’re in their circle. When your wife yearns incessantly for connection, stop telling yourself it’s her problem. When your business partners don’t act like partners, stop getting so angry at them and thinking they’ve got a screw loose. These are all examples of soft on self and hard on others. Flip this in your mind.
Habituate being hard on self, not down on self. Habituate becoming hard on self, soft on others. Hard mind and soft heart, remember. You cannot control circumstances or other people. Control your mind. Control your choices. Control you. Hard mind. Soft heart. Are you building both? Are you preparing your mind for the road ahead? Are you giving others the benefit of the doubt? Are you looking down or lifting others up? Your mindset matters more than your skill level. What’s your mindset – Can’t hurt me or Can’t? Hard on self, not down on self. Hard on self, soft on others. Hard and soft.
Aristotle was right – “Excellence is an art won by training and habituation. We do not act rightly because we have virtue or excellence, but we rather have those because we have acted rightly. We are what we repeatedly do. Excellence, then, is not an act but a habit.” What are you habituating, friend, are you hard on self, not down on self? Are you hard on self and soft on others? Are you hardening your mind for the hard things you want to do, while softening your heart for those coming alongside? Are you able to be a warrior with work, kill stuff all day, and come home, shut technology down and simply be with those you love? Slow down and sit with this for awhile. Slow down, my fast moving friend. Slow down and reflect. Good.
Live hard. Love harder (Thanks, Teeks)…