Going down…

We learn a lot through the trip down before returning up. We learn a lot, friend, going down. Whatever situation you are stepping into this Monday morning, don’t be in such a rush to clean your shoes the moment you notice you stepped into some shit. Maybe the problem is you continually step and quickly clean without thinking. Slow down, friend, especially when it stinks to do so.

You see, it’s difficult to repent (change your mind) and learn when on the down elevator. Most of us are so busy pushing buttons, we forget that we learn more from one fail than fifty wins. As I shared yesterday, for me, it wasn’t until I accepted that I was failing, that this shit with my Miss was really happening, that my soul somehow slowed down my runaway brain. You see, friend, my brain wanted to fight that this was happening, figure out the problem, and fix my Bride. She could feel me fighting this and instead of feeling accepted, she felt even more diseased. I can recall vividly when I changed my mind (repented) and accepted. Miss noticed and even said as much. It is what it is.

God, help me remember that I’m not in control. God, help me remember how much you teach us when we’re going down. God, help me accept and at the same time remain hopeful. God, help me slow down, especially when on the down elevator. God, help me go down to somehow be brought up. God, help me embrace the paradox of going down to become better; bitter, not so much. God, help me…

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2 responses to “Going down…

  1. “Keep fighting. Stop Struggling.”

    Those words were said to me by Miles Levin, 18 years old. As he was dying of childhood leukemia. Lying beside him was my own son, fighting the same leukemia.

    My hand was in a bandage, after an altercation with the doctor. I didn’t think the doctor was listening to me, so I had punched the wall by his head to get his attention. I broke three fingers. It got his attention, but did not improve his listening skills.

    When do we need the courage to fight? And when do we need the wisdom to accept, to stop struggling? I’m very good at one. I really suck at the other.

    Miles died 10 years ago. At 18 years old, he was far wiser than me. I think of his advice often.

    Keep fighting. Stop struggling.

  2. There is the beautiful, hard paradox. Keep fighting. Stop struggling. God, help us embrace this. Thanks, Kyle, for sharing…

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